Holly M. Onorato, CPRS

Stop consuming other people’s thoughts and get clarity on your own.

Finally, the holiday madness has subsided and the residual weight and debt
linger…what better time to pause and check in with yourself? The holiday season
is a time for thinking of others, their wishes, plans, and festivities, but January,
the new year, is a time to relax and reconsider where we’re at with our own
dreams, goals, and wishes. And I’m not talking about resolutions either, because
we all know how well they usually pan out.

Here are a few of my favorite tools to implement at the start of every new year.
Conducting an ‘audit’ of the past year, using information as data to create your
best life going forward.

Mosey through your pictures from 2024. What were some of the
highlights? Where are you smiling the most? Traveling to? Who were you
with? Make a list. Notice if you didn’t take too many photos, why? Were
you depressed? Working too much? Out of balance? Lacking fun, playful
times? Now is the time to notice what happened over the last year so you
can make changes going forward.

What were some of the hardest parts of 2024? Ones that broke your
heart? Wiped out your savings? Left you questioning yourself, or just felt
crappy? How long did it last and how was it resolved? What got you
through it? What tools did you use? Who was there, who wasn’t? What can
you do to avoid a repeat this year?

What did you learn about yourself? How did you grow? What got you
there?

What are you going to STOP doing this year? Any bad habits? Patterns
that keep repeating, despite your best efforts?

What are you going to START doing? Any hobbies that have fallen by the
wayside? What courses do you plan to take? Skills to learn or improve on?
Saving or investing more?

What are you going to CONTINUE doing this year? What was working for
you? Fitness goals? Gratitude practice, meditation? Now is the time to
master yourself.

As you reflect on your answers to these questions, also ask yourself, what can
you do today that is in alignment with this list? How can you start making it
happen, NOW?


Next up, JOURNALLING. Hopefully, journalling is a part of your daily repertoire,
especially as it’s a perfect companion to a life in recovery, marking your
milestones, slips, hardships, wins, etc. Over time, it can become a bit jumbly. If
you are looking for a more streamlined approach, here are some tips.
Invest in a new journal or notebook (doesn’t have to be anything fancy), write
your name and year on the binder or side, where you can clearly see it and easily
distinguish each year or ‘volume.’ Next, choose three to six different categories,
areas you normally write about, such as recovery, friendship, work, health,
family, self-care, and fun. Divide the space easily so you can jump right into
whatever area you’re working on or concerned with.

Use the front cover to document some of your favorite quotes, recipes, home
remedies, jokes, inspirations, song lyrics, etc. ones that speak to your soul and
are easily accessible and can be referenced daily. Why waste journaling time
digging through pages and pages, trying to find that one quote by that author that
you love? Now it’s right there, front and center. You can also list some of your
best qualities, strengths, things you love about yourself or compliments you have
received. Keep these at the forefront of your mind, it’s important to remember
who you are, especially on bad days.

Use the back cover to document areas you need to work on or goals you have,
you can also use a triangle with the words, Work, Rest, and Play on each side so
you maintain a sense of balance. It’s easier to see where you may be out of
alignment, ensuring a swift return to balance. You can also keep track of your

sleep schedule, and diet/exercise, so you can efficiently track your progress or
lack thereof. You may also want to include the number of hours in a year 8760,
and can keep a monthly tally if you choose. It’s a poignant reminder. We all have
the same time in a day, month, and year. How are you using that time?
Lastly, here are a few negative habits to consider relinquishing – FOR GOOD.

★ Substances, alcohol, bad relationships. Anything out of balance in your life.
★ Hitting the snooze button, seize the day, there’s nothing to accomplish in
bed.
★ STOP COMPLAINING. Even to yourself, it’s a waste of time and energy.
★ Having an opinion about everything. Just let things be as they are, and use
your time to focus on what’s within your control.
★ Being a ‘know it all.’ No one knows everything or has it all figured out.
Open your mind to being a constant student of life.
★ Letting outside events dictate your mood. Develop the art of self-mastery.
Happiness is an inside job and is never found in a bottle, pill, or
relationship.
★ Stop holding on to ‘stuff’ negative emotions, resentments/grudges, clutter.
Less is more.
★ Stop being so available. Not everyone deserves unlimited access to you or
even a response. Concentrate on your goals, not other people’s problems.
★ Seeking external validation. Just do your best, without focusing on
outcomes or other’s approval.
★ Stop letting everything in. News, social media, and other people’s opinions.
★ Stop consuming other people’s thoughts and get clarity on your own.
★ Stop competing with other people or an old version of yourself. We are
born again each day.
★ Stop waiting to live. Now is the time, let’s get to work!